Reflections on the Ugliness of My Heart

Friends, as I was tying the title, I accidentally typed Uglimess. This is more fitting than I care to admit. 

Before I continue, I owe a person an apology, if by chance she reads this. In one of my recent posts, I snidely remarked this person might be a she/it. She believes we are products of evolution. As a Christian, I believe she is created in the image of God, yet how inconsistent I am to speak in such a dishonorable way. To this person, regardless of what you might think of me, I am sorry for my disrespectful words. I’ve deleted a couple of my posts simply because I know they were not written from a spirit of love.

The Bible says,

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. ~ 1 Corinthians 13:1-3

If I have not love, I am nothing

For a couple of weeks I have not felt like myself. I love writing, but I have not had joy in writing. Recently my wife pointed out the ugliness of the post I had mentioned. This irritated me initially, but I knew she was right. As I thought about her words, some words that were shared in a message at church recently, and the way I’ve been feeling lately I began thinking about other things too. When was the last time a person said, “There’s something different about you,” “I see Jesus in you,” or any thing suggesting any evidence of God’s working in my life? It’s been a while. Instead, I’m left looking at the uglimess of my own heart, not liking what I see. Without love, I am nothing.